Combining religions in funerals

About Me

Combining religions in funerals

My mother converted to Judaism when she married her second husband. When she died it was a little confusing to work out what kind of ceremony to have for her funeral as she was brought up a Catholic and brought up the children from her first marriage (including me) as Catholic. The funeral home was a great help in this tricky time as they worked with the rabbi to work in some of the aspects of both religions and we ended up with a really beautiful service that everyone enjoyed. This blog has ideas on how to incorporate multiple religions into one funeral service.

Two Reasons Why It’s Not Advisable to Order a Headstone Whilst Organising a Funeral

Funeral homes will sometimes advise their clients to leave some time between the arrangement of their loved ones' funerals and the time at which they order the headstone. Here are two reasons why.

It's easier to manage the costs that come with this process

Funeral homes may recommend that a client not order their loved one's headstone if the client in question is struggling to afford the funeral. The reason for this is that because of the expertise required to make them and how robust the materials used need to be, even basic headstones can cost quite a bit.

When a person is dealing with the many expenses that come with funeral planning, they may find that at that point, they have very little that they can set aside for the headstone. As such, if they order it whilst they're still planning and paying for the funeral, they may end up ordering one much simpler and less beautiful than they would have liked.

However, if they wait, for example, a couple of months after the funeral to begin ordering this item, this could give them the time they need to generate more funds to afford a grander headstone that they feel truly befits their wonderful loved one's grave. Furthermore, given that headstones cannot usually be placed onto graves for several months after the graves have been created, it's not even necessary for cash-strapped people to rush this process anyway, and choosing not to hurry to is likely to result in them being happier with the headstone they select.

It's better to wait until the grief is not as overwhelming

If a funeral director meets a client who is openly devastated by the loss of the person who died and is clearly finding the funeral planning hard to cope with, then they might gently recommend that the person waits a while before focusing their efforts on ordering the headstone.

The reason for this is that when people are grieving, their cognition can be affected, and they often find decision-making harder than they usually do. Because of this, they may be more likely to impulsively choose a headstone design without considering the costs or thinking about whether it's truly the best design for their loved one's grave. As such, if a person orders a headstone whilst their grief is still very fresh and painful, there is a risk they might, for instance, order a headstone that has an unsuitable poem on it or whose design is one that their loved one would not have approved of.  

Keep these tips in mind when looking to order a headstone from a supplier near you.